hold that thought

I’ve been on hold now for nearly fifteen minutes, which has me thinking.

I have been on hold a lot in my life, especially with the Division of Unemployment Assistance, not to mention my insurance company, the doctor’s office and today, Home Depot. So, I think I know something of being on hold. And yet, there are a lot of things I am not sure of when I am on hold.

For instance, what is the proper length of time to be on hold: five minutes, ten minutes, forty-five minutes? What if they forget about you, is it okay to hang up then? When is it safe to call back after being on hold for a long time? And what should you say: “Remember me?”

Sometimes, I am tempted to hang up so that the person on the other end of the line doesn’t think I have nothing better to do than to wait for them. “My time is valuable, too,” I have been known to yell into the dead receiver. Then, sometimes, I resolve to hang on the line for as long as it takes just for the satisfaction of saying, “I have been holding for fifty minutes; I think I deserve some attention!”

I guess I can give it a few more minutes before I hang up; after all, if I don’t get through today, there’s always tomorrow