how do you shampoo?

Have you been down the shampoo aisle lately? When you go take plenty of refreshments with you because you're going to be there a while.

I can remember when we used to buy shampoo based on the way it smelled, the goal being to find the one that was most likely to get the guy who sat behind you in geometry class to notice you (when I discovered Herbal Essence I flicked my hair so often I got a crick in my neck).

These days, however, there are so many more things to consider when making your selection. First is the look you're going for. Do you want sleek and shiny hair or full and voluptuous? Straight or curly? short or long? Then there is the condition of your hair. Is it dry? damaged? (And really what is the difference between the two?) Color-treated? Frizzy? Fine? And what about the color? Are you brunette, blond, red-head? There's a shampoo for that. I've often wondered what would happen if a brunette used a shampoo for blonds. Would her hair turn green? Or would the shampoo police step out from behind the two-way glass at Target and tell her to put down the shampoo before somebody gets hurt?

The craziness, however, doesn't stop with shampoo and conditioners (I hope someone else out there remembers when conditioner was a novel concept). There are heat protectors and clarifiers and, if those don't work, restorative masks to undue the damage that's been done. There are also curl boosting sprays and volume maximizing mousse, spike creams and sculpting gels and, of course, good old fashioned hairspray (in varying levels of "hold"). Yikes.

So how do you choose which one is right for you? For me it all comes down to one thing: which bottle will fit best on the side of my tub given the hundreds of other hair care products I once thought I needed.