The other day, I had a to-do list that was a mile long. Working, I've discovered, can really cut into your productive time.
When I got home, I went upstairs, changed my clothes and got ready to get some things done, starting with a few long overdue emails. As I neared the computer, I spotted Lilly, head in hands.
"What's up?" I asked, half looking at her and three-quarters looking at the computer.
"Nothing," she said. "Just the most boring summer...EVER!" Mind you, it was only the first full day of summer vacation.
"That's no fun," I said, trying to sound the least bit sympathetic. "What would make it better?"
"If we could DO something," she moaned.
"Like...." I said, finally turning to look at her.
"I don't know," she mumbled just as a great, big, giant teardrop slid down her cheek, leaving a little trail through the dirt and smearing my mental to-do list.
"How 'bout," I said, in a rather uncharacteristic display of spontaneity, "we play some tennis. At the high school?" Which, really, was a stupid question. Because, asking Lilly to do something with me that does not involve a shopping cart or a vacuum cleaner is like asking a dog if he wants to go for a ride. And offering to play tennis with her, on a public court, is like throwing a t-bone steak in the car first.
"Yeah," she said, brightening. So, while I went upstairs to change my clothes, again, she packed the car complete with tennis racquets, tennis balls and water bottles.
When we got to the courts they were fairly empty which was a good thing since one court is just not big enough for me. Or Lilly. When we got tired of chasing the balls around, we started stuffing them in our shorts to see who looked sillier (me) and drank water out of a tiny hole in the bottom of one of our bottles to see who could get more(Lilly). And we pretended to be really good players with a lightning fast serve. And we laughed. More than anything, we laughed.
On the way home I thought: this was way better than email.
This is summer.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Monday, June 7, 2010
30--no make that 27--lunches to go
I have taken to counting down the school year not in days or weeks but in lunches.
"Only thirty more lunches to pack," I told my daughter at breakfast today.
That's:
15 bagels (5 with cream cheese and 10 with butter)
4 cartons of juice boxes
2 giant boxes of Goldfish crackers, rainbow
2 quarts of strawberries, cut
4 boxes of Special K bars
10 Odwalla bars
"Won't you make lunch for us over the summer," Lilly asked, doe-eyed, at the bus stop.
"Nope," I said. They don't call it summer vacation for nuthin'.
"Only thirty more lunches to pack," I told my daughter at breakfast today.
That's:
15 bagels (5 with cream cheese and 10 with butter)
4 cartons of juice boxes
2 giant boxes of Goldfish crackers, rainbow
2 quarts of strawberries, cut
4 boxes of Special K bars
10 Odwalla bars
"Won't you make lunch for us over the summer," Lilly asked, doe-eyed, at the bus stop.
"Nope," I said. They don't call it summer vacation for nuthin'.
Monday, May 31, 2010
parenting 101
Yesterday, Mark and I planted tomatoes.
After reading up on what to do, we marked out a nice, sunny spot on the lawn where we wanted the bed to go. Then, we cut away the sod and removed it, one six-inch piece at a time. Next, we turned over the soil, digging out rocks and breaking up clumps , until it was light and fluffy. Then, we added in manure and peat moss and mixed it all up until the soil was a deep, rich brown throughout.
After that, we dug a hole for each plant--slightly larger and deeper than the pot--and removed the suckers growing at the bottom of each stem. Next, we laid black landscaping fabric over the entire bed and cut slits in it over each of the holes we had already prepared. When that was done, we lowered the plants through the plastic and into the holes and packed the loose soil firmly around them. Finally, we slid wire cages around each of the plants to support them as they grow and watered it all in, filling in any gaps or air pockets around the roots so that they might grow deep into the soil.
And that's just the beginning.
In the months to come there will be weeds to contend with as well as other critters and pests. Blight, too, is a real possibility as are a number of things beyond our ability to control. But, Mark and I will deal with it all in the hope of one day harvesting the ripe, sweet fruit.
As I waited for Amelia to come home last night (well past her curfew) I thought how like gardening parenting is.
After reading up on what to expect, we painstakingly prepare the soil: the right schools, the right friends, the right influences, art, books, sports. Then, we make every effort to protect our children from things that might harm them--pedophiles, drugs, alcohol, risky behavior--and try to provide them with a support system--family, friends, community--that will enable our kids to thrive and grow strong. And we water it all in with discipline and firm boundaries so that there are no gaps in their learning, no questions about right and wrong, so that they may be firmly planted wherever they land.
But, in the end, there will be nights like these--and more of them, I suspect, as our children grow--when all Mark and I can do is rub our hands over the things we cannot control and hope, and pray, that one day we will reap a harvest of ripe, sweet fruit.
After reading up on what to do, we marked out a nice, sunny spot on the lawn where we wanted the bed to go. Then, we cut away the sod and removed it, one six-inch piece at a time. Next, we turned over the soil, digging out rocks and breaking up clumps , until it was light and fluffy. Then, we added in manure and peat moss and mixed it all up until the soil was a deep, rich brown throughout.
After that, we dug a hole for each plant--slightly larger and deeper than the pot--and removed the suckers growing at the bottom of each stem. Next, we laid black landscaping fabric over the entire bed and cut slits in it over each of the holes we had already prepared. When that was done, we lowered the plants through the plastic and into the holes and packed the loose soil firmly around them. Finally, we slid wire cages around each of the plants to support them as they grow and watered it all in, filling in any gaps or air pockets around the roots so that they might grow deep into the soil.
And that's just the beginning.
In the months to come there will be weeds to contend with as well as other critters and pests. Blight, too, is a real possibility as are a number of things beyond our ability to control. But, Mark and I will deal with it all in the hope of one day harvesting the ripe, sweet fruit.
As I waited for Amelia to come home last night (well past her curfew) I thought how like gardening parenting is.
After reading up on what to expect, we painstakingly prepare the soil: the right schools, the right friends, the right influences, art, books, sports. Then, we make every effort to protect our children from things that might harm them--pedophiles, drugs, alcohol, risky behavior--and try to provide them with a support system--family, friends, community--that will enable our kids to thrive and grow strong. And we water it all in with discipline and firm boundaries so that there are no gaps in their learning, no questions about right and wrong, so that they may be firmly planted wherever they land.
But, in the end, there will be nights like these--and more of them, I suspect, as our children grow--when all Mark and I can do is rub our hands over the things we cannot control and hope, and pray, that one day we will reap a harvest of ripe, sweet fruit.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
Memorial Day!
Here's what was in my shopping cart today:
Bathing suits
beach towels
sunscreen
tomato plants
basil plants
verbena
iced tea jug
It must be Memorial Day!
Bathing suits
beach towels
sunscreen
tomato plants
basil plants
verbena
iced tea jug
It must be Memorial Day!
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
love-40
On days like these, I feel as though I am on a tennis court with balls being lobbed at me left and right: prom, birthdays, sports, spring concerts, summer plans--and I have only a few seconds to react. Sometimes, I hit the ball with the sweet-spot on my racquet and send it soaring over the net to the astonishment of all around, including myself. Other times, it bounces off the rim of my racquet and either falls short of the net or veers off wildly onto someone else's court. Still other times I miss the ball entirely and it comes down with a mind-numbing thump right on the top of my head.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
a no-good (very bad) day
Have you ever had one of those days when the only thing you had to look forward to was getting back into bed? I did. It all started when I over-conditioned my hair. No good can come of a day when your hair is flat and greasy, I tell you, and nothing did.
My shoes didn't match my belt, my shirt was stained and I couldn't find my favorite earrings. And let's just say in my low-slung pants my underwear was no secret.
I was late for lunch with Mark and missed the first three innings of Daisy's softball game. I changed the appointment for Amelia's dress fitting three times and still couldn't make it.
The spareribs were tough and there was no vegetable with dinner, just cornbread.
I yelled at Lilly, I yelled at Mark, I yelled at Amelia and Mabel. Daisy was the only one I didn't yell at but then I didn't see her all day either.
Climbing into bed I thought, "one day I will look back on this day and laugh." But not for a long time, I tell you; not for a very long time.
My shoes didn't match my belt, my shirt was stained and I couldn't find my favorite earrings. And let's just say in my low-slung pants my underwear was no secret.
I was late for lunch with Mark and missed the first three innings of Daisy's softball game. I changed the appointment for Amelia's dress fitting three times and still couldn't make it.
The spareribs were tough and there was no vegetable with dinner, just cornbread.
I yelled at Lilly, I yelled at Mark, I yelled at Amelia and Mabel. Daisy was the only one I didn't yell at but then I didn't see her all day either.
Climbing into bed I thought, "one day I will look back on this day and laugh." But not for a long time, I tell you; not for a very long time.
Saturday, May 8, 2010
a job!
I got a job. It is not the job I had hoped for, nor is it the job I spent years (and years) studying in school for. And it is not the job I imagined myself doing at this stage in my life. But, it is a job. And, as they say in these tough economic times, that's something.
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